i'm lucky i'm in love

Saturday, February 28, 2009

Haiku-shmiaku

Its Sunday morning
The coffee sings to my nose
What is wrong with you?

Something put together with songs.

Everyday feels like a monday
There is no escaping from this heartache
I'm looking for love this time, sounding hopeful, but its making me cry
Cos love is a mystery...
Pull out the stops, got your attention
I guess its time again for me to mention the wordplay.
We could've fallen in love.

^
I wrote that then didn't want to post it since it doesn't have any entertainment value.
But whatev. I don't feel like deleting it either.
Creating content is such a joy and a bother at the same time.

The creation of content brings much joy but inconvenience simultaneously.
Many young people turn to the internet, as much of the content which they require to complete school assignments with is readily available.

Am I getting better at nominalisation?

The discovery of a new immunisation to cancer at a local pharmaceutical agency is creating waves globally. The scientists created this drug through the process of researching the anatomy of cancer causing mutated cells. Studies have shown that a space in the cell gives it the capacity and potential to become cancerous through mutation. The blockage of this space in a cell will obstruct such an action; the drug functions by serving as a filler to block this space and impede such adverse mutations.

Bahhumbug.

Obviously the journalistic world uses expository-style english. How am I to enter it like this?

Thursday, February 26, 2009

Nothing to do. I can't nominalise.
Totally failed at it during english today.
Mr L was totally nice about it, but I could tell he was trying to be nice about it.
I'm repeating information, I know.

Why can't I nominalise?
Ahhhhhh.

Expository

The skill of a written expository essay is found nowhere in this study. The usage of nouns must be slightly less than excessive, and verbs are close to non-existent.

I cannot. why.

And ok, awesome insult coming up:

"Hey you, stop wasting oxygen. "

OMG.
I cannot believe I just did that.
Thank goodness he didn't get it.

And I realised my recovering line reeked of it all.
But only to a lit student I think.
So funny.

like:
no, you're absolutely fine.

I can't believe myself.

Labels: ooooooooommmmmmmmggggg

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Sunday. The experience of a lifetime. The experience of losing to other people. Getting totally owned.

But also the experience of performing in front of a group of strangers, fighting for something you really want.
The experience of being so nervous and learning how to handle it.

The experience of deciding to just have fun anyway.

It was a bittersweet experience.
Thank you Winona for joining me in my insanity!

We did a medley: Wordplay, The Remedy, I'm Yours.
I think if we practise more, we can actually perform for people.
I really had fun.

Just a little sore that we didn't win the Mraz tickets though.
We hung around the mall from 1.30+ all the way till 8.
It was funny cos we stayed to watch all the performances before us, and there were guest singers coming down to make music and promote themselves and all.

3.30 Jack and Rai
5.30 A lady and a man who could sing VERY well.

Winona and I were grooving to the music at the fringes of the crowd, cos J&R were playing All Star by Smash Mouth and it was a fun song, when Jack I think, grinned at us.
It was strange, connecting for just a split second with a complete stranger.
Imagine what catching Jason's eye at his concert would be like.
Crazy, I imagine.

Now I want to listen to local bands performing. Not those rock kind, but the pop-py, chill kind.
Too bad all they perform at are bars and I'm under 18.

Come back soon Mr. Mraz, and I'll be waiting at Sistic.

Wednesday, February 18, 2009

I just saw the word "Flexible" next to three large crayons- the jumbo kind the kiddies use? (like, whaaaaaat?)

But my brain didn't have much of a problem processing that information, seeing the amount of irrelevant crappy nonsense I put into it everyday. (and me brain loves it.)

But it made me happier than I normally am for just that split second, which is a pretty awesome place to be. I'm glad to see that insanity and irrelevance still rules on the internet, enough to pop out once in awhile and greet me.

I can't help but sound so happy.
But I'm really not that happy?
I'm more confused and occupied with my hoards of unnecessary thoughts than happy.
Too much thinking for my own good but I just can't help it.

Wondering every moment, anticipating, hoping, predicting, analyzing, praying.
I don't think its very good for the brain.

It might overheat or something.
Since its doing all of the above while doing math at the same time. Along with other subjects.

You know all you have to do is...
Why wouldn't anybody know that?
And the truth glares at me. Straight in the eyes.

I'm not looking.

Saturday, February 14, 2009

This one killed me.

Haha @ no. 3.

Taken from http://www.telegraph.co.uk/travel/picturegalleries/signlanguage

Friday, February 13, 2009

It all boils down to nothing.
Bare bones and foam, thats what it is.

No more panache left.
Why aren't I laughing anymore?

I'm supposed to be happy.
I still want this though. I guess I still do.

I am not miserable, just ponderational.

And and and. Chingmay bought me a threadless shirt!!!
Yayyyyyyyyyyyyy.
I'll put pics up soon!

Labels: We're (not)on the same level

Thursday, February 12, 2009

I am a shell.
Today I saw an open head surgery on TV.
The man was kept awake because the doctors needed him to respond to ensure that his brain was still working.
Can you imagine?

Lying with your head cut open, people poking around in your brain, and then they say to you: "Wriggle your toes"

Science doesn't explain the presence of a soul, it can't because the soul is not tangible, not physical. But we all know we're more than just nervous impulses at work. We're not just chemical reactions.

You want chemical reactions, look at animals, like earthworms or rabbits. Of course we wouldn't know if they really do feel and think independently, but they mostly act on instinct, reacting to stimulus from their environment. They produce adrenaline when they need it to survive. Adrenaline causes short term changes in the way their body works so they escape danger. Thats all.

But we have consciousness. The ability to dream, wonder, explore, feel. Yeah, we have the basic physical body to live, with the adrenaline and nerves, but theres something else. The essence of you. Its not just your brain releasing chemicals, making you feel emotions. Sure, hormones can affect your emotions, since we are our bodies, but you: You're not your body.

You're inside your body.

So is the soul immortal?
This shell dies of degeneration after some years, because our cells can only divide so many times. The very first cell that we started from has divided and divided to make the billions of cells that make up your body. But it can only divide so many times.
Death is inevitable.

But the soul is not a biological, organic compound. Its energy, consciousness. All energy goes somewhere. It is converted, but cannot be destroyed.

So what happens to the soul when the body dies?

Start planning for your soul today. Don't put it off because you never know when your body might fail you.

There are two places your soul can go.

The first place, you don't have to even try. You're going there because of what you are: a wretched, lousy sinner, and no amount of good things you do can redeem you since your bad stuff >good stuff. Always. Its the way the world is.

The next place is a gift. Someone died for you because he couldn't bear the thought of a future without you.
All you have to do is to believe.

Would the person who loves you the most die for you? I don't think I could do it for anybody.

There is a God, there is accountability, and unless you make a decision today, your soul is condemned to eternal suffering.

People say this all the time, until it almost doesn't mean anything anymore. But there is a higher being that made everything you see, breathe, eat, love.

He knows you inside out, like an engineer knows the machine he created.
He loves what he made, since he made it, and it was perfect.
He doesn't want you to suffer eternal damnation.

You are going to hell. You deserve it. I deserve it.
But he made another way. A way that changed the course of universal history. You have a ticket to heaven, because he died for you.
All you have to do is believe.

You know that your body is dying. Right now, cells are dying. In a short 80 years, your soul would have completed this part of its life here on earth. But it doesn't end there. Theres still eternity to deal with. Earth is just a passing-by place, a little passage on the path of infinity.

This wonderful, loving creator God is who I know as Jesus.
Hes not a religion.
Hes a person for the lack of a better term.
He exists, he has plans for you and me. He loves you.

Hes bought your ticket, all you have to do is to collect it by believing that he exists and meeting up with him so he can give it to you.

Christian doesn't mean going to church and doing good deeds and not lying, cheating and stealing.
Christian means I personally know the God who made me.
Christianity is a relationship with Jesus.

Theres no formality in it, in terms of rigid religious rules and practices. Theres no such thing as, "if I do this, I will make God happy and then he will give me good luck"

Theres nothing you can do to make him love you more than he already does. Its pure, unconditional, fatherly love.

All you have to do is believe in him.
Hes waiting for you. Hes been waiting a million years for you to say the words: "Dear Jesus, thank you for loving me, and dying for me. I believe in you. Please be with me for all eternity."

Knowing God is wonderful. It doesn't make life easier, but life is made much better. You finally become complete. Everything that you've been looking for, everything that has felt missing has been God. All along. You just didn't know.

Seriously, its the best thing that can happen to you in this life. And after that.
All you have to do is to believe.

If you've decided that you want to know this God, all you have to do is to talk to him. Theres no "proper" way to do it, just say it, he can hear you.
Theres a sample line in the sixth last paragraph. You could tell that to God, or you could go to this website, which has an example of a simple prayer you could use.

Don't worry about what others think. This is you being in charge of your life, your soul making a decision.
Its personal.
Jesus loves you.
Seriously.

And I love you too.
But not in that way.
I am going to fall asleep in class tomorrow, seeing its almost 11pm now.
Dinosaurs are awesome.

Labels: God made the dinosaurs

Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Ivva sorethroat!
And coughing
and sneezing
and runnynosing

I'm symptomatic, but not sick since I haven't a fever.

I'm not miserable!

And what kind of self-respecting, proper student fails a SS test?
Just because everyone else got around the same marks doesn't make it ok.
I should be disappointed at myself, I really should. But I don't know why I just feel optimistic.
Ms T would be mad that I don't feel properly.
Maybe its my sense of self-preservation that kicks in, so I don't get all depressed and psycho.

That could be it.

MDigby:
Why's it always feel like I am chasing love when nothings there? Here I go just making the same mistake...

JMraz:
I'm looking for love this time, sounding hopeful, but its making me cry.

I wanna see Mr. Mraz in march. But I don't have tickets.
:(

I like lyrics most!

Saturday, February 7, 2009

Standard Tuning
Capo 5th Fret

Intro
G Em Am D

G Em Am
Are you special are you dreaming are you shy around girls?
D G
Are you listening, are you wishing are you hoping just like me?

G Em
What are you?
Am D ///
What are you what are you?

G Em Am
A million hundred thousand signals being sent at once
D G
Across the same the same the same the same old space
G-Em Am
Did they get crossed
D
Did they get amended?

G Em
Did you get my message,
Am D
And pretend you didn't ....know?
G Em
Did you get my message,
Am D
Or are you just, just not sold?

I'm not done with it, but I dunno if I'll actually make the effort to finish it.
Its also going to go nameless.

*Edit*
I originally typed the chords on top of the lyrics where the chords should change. But blogger took those spaces away. :O

Thursday, February 5, 2009

My head hurts.
As in a headache.
We had school today, plus SSP, plus a 1 1/2 hour chem test.

My fun and energy bars are in the red. (Haha. Sims reference.)

I can't bring myself to do my homework. I'm so sick of studying...its been the entire day.
But I have to pass them up tomorrow.
How?

Thank God the only test tomorrow is an English test, so I'm not in a mugging frenzy. I couldn't take another mugging fest now, anyway.

I'm wondering how I'm going to cope in the outside world when this is only February of the O'levels year.

The Arctic Monkeys are awesome. I like their Teddy Picker song. I don't know why. They're indie rock. I hate rock. I hate rock 'n roll. But I like the Arctic Monkeys.

And Weather Girl by Shiny Toy Guns. Its strange cos all their other songs are those typical techno dancey songs that I hate. I only like Weather Girl cos it has this Ting Tings vibe to it.

Biology was super awesome today. We were looking at our cheek cells under the microscope today, and mine looked like fried eggs! They looked really pretty.
And also I was picking at my scab, trying to get some blood out so I could look at it under the microscope. I really want to see red blood cells! But in the end I could only see a scab on the slide, dunno how it got there. It was scary but intriguing at the same time. Who knew a scab was made out of so many tiny circular pieces joined together? There were like red and yellow pieces. I guess the yellow stuff was the blood plasma that dried up, and the red stuff was the haemoglobin in the red blood cells that dried up too. Fibrinogen activates the formation of fibrin that helps the clotting of blood. I'm rambling biology. I love it.

And and and, Eliada and I came up with awesome band names today! (Yes during biology) Cos I have these Dinosaurs sitting on my form table, and a penguin with a pencil stuck up its arse in my pencil box. So Eliada was looking at the penguin and wrote: "Penguins and Dinosaurs"
So I started thinking: "Modern Dinosaurs and Prehistoric Penguins"
And then she was like, YEAH!
Those would make awesome band names.
And also, a bad biology joke was made by Eliada today.
There was a sign that told you what to do when you encounter "Biological Spills". So the joke was that if you spilled the contents of a biology experiment, like the potatoes we were cutting up for SPA, you could panic and say: "Oh no! I've made a Biological Spill!"

Haha.
I think I'm lame enough already.
As in literally. *crutches//

Imma try to do homework now.
I want to be able to draw well. I like art, but I can't express myself in art. Shizzzz

Labels: maybe yes?, no