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Sunday, April 19, 2009

I feel all apprehensive and stuff.
I may be secretly going insane but not know it.

Mark Haddon's A Spot of Bother started off really entertaining but its getting slightly disturbing.

I need to get motivated to be all effective and efficient.
To study as well. Its painful to sit down and do work, but theres nothing meaningful to do except study, which I really don't want to do.
So I end up wasting time looking for things to do, and not finding it.

HELP.

Life is losing its layer of shimmer.

It is, and I can't write a poem about it now.

Entertainment is becoming too routine, so it seems to me like I'm just taking in content to occupy myself and hopefully find something at least vaguely amusing or meaningful.

Since when did I get so jaded?
I don't like my life now, and I can't seem to find the will to get myself out of it.
Its not like I'm emo, far from it.
But I'm this close to flailing.
No one should ever reach the flailing stage. Seriously.

I just realised that I have nothing to look forward to.
Perhaps thats why I 'm feeling like this.

How?

Labels: I wish Sian was an english word. That way I could explain it all better.